Understanding the Problem
Underage drinking is a serious public health issue that affects millions of young people and their families. Alcohol is the most commonly used substance among youth in the United States, and underage drinking can lead to serious consequences including accidents, injuries, poor academic performance, risky behaviors, and long-term health problems.
As a parent, you play a crucial role in preventing underage drinking and protecting your child. Research shows that parents have a significant influence on their children's decisions about alcohol, and there are many effective strategies you can use to help prevent underage drinking.
Why Prevention Matters
Risks of Underage Drinking
- • Brain development: Alcohol can harm the developing adolescent brain, affecting memory, learning, and decision-making
- • Academic problems: Drinking can lead to poor grades, missed school, and decreased academic performance
- • Risky behaviors: Underage drinking increases the risk of accidents, injuries, violence, and unsafe sexual behavior
- • Legal consequences: Underage drinking is illegal and can result in fines, community service, and criminal records
- • Health problems: Early alcohol use increases the risk of developing alcohol use disorder later in life
- • Death: Alcohol-related accidents are a leading cause of death among young people
The Good News
Research consistently shows that parents have a powerful influence on their children's decisions about alcohol. When parents are involved, communicate clearly, set rules, and monitor their children's activities, the risk of underage drinking decreases significantly. Your actions and words matter.
What Parents Can Do
1. Start Early and Talk Often
Begin talking about alcohol early, before your child is exposed to it. Continue the conversation as they grow older. Make it an ongoing dialogue, not a one-time lecture.
- • Start age-appropriate conversations about alcohol in elementary school
- • Use everyday situations as teaching moments
- • Answer questions honestly and directly
- • Listen to your child's thoughts and concerns
- • Keep the conversation going through the teen years
2. Set Clear Rules and Expectations
Children and teens need clear, consistent rules about alcohol. Make your expectations known and enforce consequences consistently.
- • Clearly state that underage drinking is not allowed
- • Explain the reasons behind your rules
- • Set consequences for breaking rules and follow through
- • Be consistent with rules across all situations
- • Review and adjust rules as your child gets older
3. Be a Positive Role Model
Your behavior matters. Children learn by watching their parents. Model responsible alcohol use if you choose to drink.
- • If you drink, do so responsibly and in moderation
- • Never drink and drive
- • Don't use alcohol to cope with stress or problems
- • Show that you can have fun without alcohol
- • Talk about your own choices regarding alcohol
4. Monitor Your Child's Activities
Know where your child is, who they're with, and what they're doing. Supervision and monitoring are key to preventing underage drinking.
- • Know your child's friends and their parents
- • Know where your child is going and when they'll be home
- • Check in regularly when they're away from home
- • Be present at parties and social events when possible
- • Monitor social media and online activities
- • Set curfews and enforce them
5. Build Strong Relationships
Children who have strong, positive relationships with their parents are less likely to engage in risky behaviors like underage drinking.
- • Spend quality time together regularly
- • Show interest in your child's life, activities, and friends
- • Be available to listen and talk
- • Show love, support, and encouragement
- • Be involved in your child's school and activities
- • Build trust through open communication
6. Help Your Child Resist Peer Pressure
Teach your child how to say no to alcohol and handle peer pressure effectively.
- • Role-play situations where they might be offered alcohol
- • Help them practice saying no in different ways
- • Encourage them to choose friends who don't drink
- • Teach them to leave situations where alcohol is present
- • Let them know they can call you for help anytime
- • Build their self-confidence and self-esteem
Warning Signs of Underage Drinking
Physical Signs
- • Smell of alcohol on breath or clothing
- • Slurred speech or coordination problems
- • Bloodshot eyes
- • Unexplained injuries or bruises
- • Changes in sleep patterns
Behavioral Changes
- • Changes in friends or social groups
- • Loss of interest in activities they used to enjoy
- • Secretive behavior or lying
- • Mood swings or irritability
- • Poor academic performance
Social Changes
- • Avoiding family activities
- • Spending more time alone
- • Defensive when asked about activities
- • Breaking curfew or rules
- • Money or valuables missing
Other Warning Signs
- • Finding alcohol in their room or belongings
- • Using breath mints or mouthwash excessively
- • Changes in appearance or hygiene
- • Legal problems or trouble at school
- • Depression or anxiety
Important: Some of these signs can also indicate other problems or normal adolescent development. If you notice multiple warning signs or are concerned, talk to your child and consider seeking professional help.
What to Do If Your Child Is Drinking
Stay Calm and Talk
If you discover your child has been drinking, stay calm and have a conversation. Avoid yelling or lecturing, which can shut down communication.
- • Wait until everyone is calm to have the conversation
- • Express your concerns clearly and calmly
- • Listen to what your child has to say
- • Ask questions to understand the situation
- • Avoid making assumptions or jumping to conclusions
Enforce Consequences
Follow through with appropriate consequences that you've established. Consequences should be fair, consistent, and related to the behavior.
- • Enforce the rules and consequences you've set
- • Make consequences meaningful but not overly harsh
- • Focus on helping your child learn from the experience
- • Be consistent with consequences
Get Professional Help
If your child's drinking is ongoing, severe, or causing problems, seek professional help. Don't try to handle it alone.
- • Talk to your child's pediatrician or a mental health professional
- • Consider counseling or substance abuse treatment
- • Look for support groups for parents
- • Get help early — don't wait for things to get worse
Increase Supervision
If your child has been drinking, increase your supervision and monitoring. Know where they are, who they're with, and what they're doing.
- • Tighten rules and supervision
- • Know their friends and activities
- • Set stricter curfews and limits
- • Monitor their activities more closely
Additional Prevention Strategies
Secure Alcohol in Your Home
If you have alcohol in your home, keep it locked up and monitor it. Don't make it easily accessible to your children or their friends.
Connect with Other Parents
Get to know other parents and work together to prevent underage drinking. Agree on rules about parties, supervision, and alcohol. Support each other in enforcing these rules.
Support School and Community Programs
Support school and community programs that prevent underage drinking. Get involved in prevention efforts in your community.
Address Underlying Issues
Sometimes underage drinking is a symptom of other problems like depression, anxiety, or peer pressure. Address underlying issues and get help if needed.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
Q: At what age should I start talking to my child about alcohol?
A: Start early, in elementary school. Use age-appropriate language and concepts. Continue the conversation as your child grows older. It's never too early to start, and it's important to keep talking about it through the teen years.
Q: What if I catch my child drinking? How should I respond?
A: Stay calm and have a conversation. Express your concerns clearly, listen to what your child has to say, and enforce appropriate consequences. If the drinking is ongoing or severe, seek professional help. Don't try to handle it alone.
Q: Should I let my teen drink at home under supervision?
A: No. Research shows that allowing teens to drink at home does not prevent underage drinking elsewhere and may actually increase the risk. It's also illegal in most places. Set clear rules that underage drinking is not allowed, period.
Q: What if my child's friends are drinking? How can I help?
A: Talk to your child about choosing friends who don't drink. Help them practice saying no to alcohol. Encourage them to leave situations where alcohol is present. Let them know they can call you for help anytime. Consider limiting time with friends who drink.
Q: Where can I get help if my child has a drinking problem?
A: Start with your child's pediatrician or a mental health professional. They can provide evaluation and referrals to appropriate treatment. Look for substance abuse treatment programs, counselors, or support groups. The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) has a helpline and treatment locator available.
Key Takeaways
Talk Early and Often
Start conversations about alcohol early and keep them going
Set Clear Rules
Establish and enforce clear rules about underage drinking
Monitor and Supervise
Know where your child is and what they're doing
⚠️ Important Note
This article provides general information and is not intended to replace professional medical, mental health, or parenting advice. If you're concerned about your child's alcohol use, if your child has a drinking problem, or if you need help, consult with your child's pediatrician, a mental health professional, or a substance abuse treatment provider for evaluation and guidance.